December 2014 - K: Ten Things Instead of Hitting

Dear Families,

This month, we’ll continue to work on self-awareness, and helping students understand their feelings is the first step in developing self-regulation skills necessary to get along in the world.

As part of this lesson, your child’s class viewed Ten Things to Do Instead of Hitting.  For children in grades K-2, the focus of their social world has been steadily shifting outward from home to school. Along with this major transition comes new demands to cooperate with other children, to work and play in groups, and to exercise self-control over socially unacceptable impulses like hitting, yelling and throwing things. For many children of this age, their emotions are fragile, and it is not uncommon for them to have explosions in the form of tantrums, verbal attacks, or outbursts of tears. Therefore, children need to learn strategies for recognizing and dealing with their angry feelings before they get out of hand. Here are some things that you can discuss with your child when he or she seems angry.

• Help your child become aware of what is causing the anger.

You might say, “Tell me how you are feeling. Why do you think you are feeling this way?” and “What are some other ways you can think of to solve your problem?” Here are some alternatives to hitting that your child learned in the program.

• talk about angry feelings                                                • squish clay  

• cool off by counting to ten, say the alphabet, etc.    • draw a picture

• use up angry energy by working hard                         • pound a pillow

• write about angry feelings                                            • release energy by blowing up balloons

• do something active – run or jump        • dream about some favorite things to do

Practice alternatives that your child can use in actual situations when he/she is trying to avoid hitting or other unacceptable reactions. Model appropriate ways of dealing with anger and frustration at home demonstrate it’s ok to get mad, as long as the response is appropriate.

Suggested Reading : Feagin, Clairece Booher. Angry Feelings. Chicago: Contemporary Books. 1990. Leonard, Marcia. Angry. New York: Bantam Books, 1988.

Yours truly,

Ms. Cahill

School Counselor