In addition to being taught history, geography, reading, writing, and mathematics, elementary school children are constantly being taught self-development skills: how to handle a bully, how to be assertive, how to deal with peer pressure, how to handle anger, how to build self-esteem—and the list goes on and on. But there is one skill that must be mastered before any of these other social skills can be learned: how to communicate effectively. Fourth graders watched a video this month that demonstrated how to use good listening skills, and also showed examples of poor listening.
It has been said that the three most important things to consider when buying a house are location, location and location. Similarly, it may be said that the three most important factors in a child’s personality development are communication, communication and communication.
The ability to clearly communicate information, thoughts and ideas to others is absolutely crucial to success in virtually all aspects of life. Good communication skills are not only essential to a child’s learning process, but they are also necessary to establish friendships and avoid conflicts with others. Too many children have problems in their relationships because they are not able to express their ideas clearly, and their meanings and intentions are misunderstood by their peers and even the adults in their lives. By the same token, children who interfere with or block the communication of others not only have difficulty learning something new, but they often prompt others to feelings of anger, frustration and sadness.
It is possible to speak to someone without really saying anything. It is possible to hear someone speak without really listening to what is being said. Effective communication depends on many factors including tone of voice, eye contact, body language, concentration, control of one’s feelings—and respect for others. This last factor needs to be stressed, because children must be aware that everyone has a right to communicate their thoughts and feelings, and to prevent others from doing this is simply not acceptable behavior.
The I Can Communicate series was created to help children understand what constitutes good communication, and learn why this skill is necessary in order to foster healthy relationships and to succeed in school. This is a topic we will continue to visit!
Ms. Cahill
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