Nov 2015 - Gr 1: Responsible Me!

By November, our first graders are beginning to grasp that they have many new responsibilities! To help them understand what a responsibility is, and why it's important, we are viewing a short video called All About Responsibility. By teaching children the meaning of responsibility and the kinds of responsible behavior we expect, we set them on the road to independence and enable them to develop the healthy sense of self-worth that comes from the personal satisfaction of knowing they can be counted on.

Children rarely learn responsible behavior on their own. Certainly, many students may arrive in middle elementary grades having had some degree of experience in helping out with household tasks or taking responsibility for self-care. But behaving responsibly involves far more than this. It means living up to our obligations, keeping our word, taking care of our own property and that of others, and being accountable for our actions – or inactions as the case may be – including a willingness to accept any consequences that follow.

Developing a moral and ethical orientation toward personal responsibility is an essential part of growing up. The elementary years are a time when, from the standpoints of mental capability and emotional readiness, students are not only highly receptive to moral values and how they should behave in various situations, but eminently teachable.

Be aware of these ‘teachable moments’ when they arise. Children must learn to recognize that taking responsibility for their actions increases their sense of independence and self-worth. They must also become aware that irresponsible behavior can have unforeseen and unwelcome consequences.

Reading for parents: Parenting With Love and Logic, by Foster Cline and Jim Fay; Grow Up: How Taking Responsibility Can Make You a Happy Adult, by Frank Pittman; Raising a Responsible Child: How Parents Can Avoid Overindulgent Behavior and Nurture Healthy Children, by Elizabeth Ellis.

Nov 2015 - Kindergarten - Differences

 

Kindergartners are viewing a program called We’re All Different this month. The early grades constitute an expanding universe for young children, whose former experiences may have previously been limited to home and family. Classrooms at Florence Roche are inclusive, and children are learning first hand the meaning of equal worth, even as they observe what's equal is not always fair, and what's fair is not always equal. A difficult concept! But as they become more group-oriented and develop social skills, children begin to compare themselves to their peers, and take notice of differences.

We’re All Different helps the youngest students understand that even though everyone is different in lots of ways, everyone is special because he or she is “one of a kind.” They also learn that while we are all different, we are also alike in many ways. With the help of an engaging puppet host and catchy theme song, the program makes the following points:

• Everyone is special in his or her own special way.

• Some people look different, and some can do things others can’t do, but we’re all the same in some important ways.

• Working together, different people with different talents and abilities can make things the best they can be.

• People from different places have different customs and eat different foods.

• It’s important to respect differences in people’s cultures and tastes.

• Just because people are different doesn’t mean they don’t have the same feelings as everyone else.

Talk to your child about what he/she has learned from the program. All children receive daily messages about the differences between themselves and others, and they need to identify, understand, and appreciate the similarities.

Suggested Reading: Whoever You Are by Mem Fox, The Colors of the Earth by Sheila Hamanaka, The Story of the Infinipede by Bridget Noel Welch Kamke.

Nov 2015 Gr 2: Making Friends

We all know that friendships are very important to children's social development and emotional well-being. Children who lack friends feel less connected to their school community, may do less well academically and behaviorally. If the trend continues throughout their formative years, they may also be more prone to anxiety and depression. This month 2nd graders are listening to this book:


 There can be many reasons why a child struggles to connect with others, but it is often simply a lack in three basic social skills:

• How to break the ice with kids they don't know well (or at all). Initiating play with others is a bit intimidating, and can feel especially risky for the more introverted child. Try to objectively observe your child in new social settings and identify their strengths and weaknesses. 
• Role play with children how to act positively and play cooperatively with others. Many children have difficulty compromising and letting others take the lead in play.
• Conflict resolution. Inevitably, disagreements will arise, and all children need skills to manage conflict constructively. This is another situation where you can role-play scenarios with your child.

Remind children that these are life-long skills EVERYBODY works on as they journey through life. We must remember that it is not necessary for a child to have dozens of friends, but the importance of one or two close friends cannot be underestimated.

Oct 2015 Gr 4: Apologizing

 

Once again, I go to a favorite author for social emotional learning! Fourth graders listened to the book Sorry!  by Trudy Ludwig. Dr. Aaron Lazare, author of On Apology, best describes the intent behind this lesson:

“Making a genuine apology seems like a sensible, constructive thing to do when one person offends another. Yet it is remarkable how frequently apologies are withheld or offered in a manner that offends rather than heals. The reasons for such failures are the fear of being shamed, being seen as weak, being rejected, or the like. With fears like these, we can see that learning to apologize is no small matter. Overcoming them requires honesty, generosity, commitment, humility and courage.

Apologizing is best learned in childhood and the most obvious teachers are parents and educators. Yet when we adults are clumsy and fearful about apologizing, when we believe it is dangerous to apologize, when we believe apologizing is a sign of weakness, we are apt to fail as positive role models for our children.”  

We often find ourselves commanding one child to apologize to another. What results is frequently half-hearted, insincere, and given only under the pressure of an adult. This rarely results in making amends on the part of the offended person, and the offender does not actually gain understanding 

either.  The story line in Sorry! Illustrates the four crucial parts of making an effective apology:

 

Oct 2015 Gr 1: Fair Play

First graders got a look at a new book that was donated to our school by the author, Josh Funk. In his day job, he is a colleague of a kindergarten parent and we were fortunate to receive this copy!

I especially like the story because it demonstrates what can happen between friends when things get too competitive. Poor choices are made, sometimes dangerous situations arise, and feelings are hurt as Lady Pancake and Sir French Toast race through the refrigerator in hopes of claiming the last drop of syrup for themselves. 

Students were able to identify actions poor sportsmanship during different aspects of the story. Furthermore, they made could name the different 'feeling' words that each character may have been experiencing. 

I'm so impressed with how many things from our Kindergarten lessons these first graders have retained! It's gratifying to see them absorb the concepts of self and others, along with how our actions can impact those around us and how they feel about us a result of our behavior. 

We will continue to work on our 'feelings vocabulary', taking perspective, and using self-control!

Sept 2015 - Gr 1: Rules

Welcome to a new school year! This is the time of year when we're all adjusting to the structure of being in school, and learning our classroom and school rules. I feel it's important to explain the 'why' of rules here at school, so that children have an understanding that there are very good reasons rules are in place. Welcome to a new school year! This is the time of year when we're all adjusting to the structure of being in school, and learning our classroom and school rules. I feel it's important to explain the 'why' of rules here at school, so that children have an understanding that there are very good reasons rules are in place.
 For our first  Social Emotional Learning lesson of the school year in Kindergarten and 1st grade, your child viewed a short program called I Can Follow Rules by Sunburst  Visual Media. This topic is one that is import to all age groups because rules are a part of our everyday lives. It is especially important to discuss this topic with your child, because failure to follow the rules can often create unfair, unkind, or unsafe situations. Here are some questions you can ask your child to help open a discussion:

• What are some of the rules that you have to follow in school?
• Are there any rules that you don’t understand? What are they?
• Is it hard for you to follow any of the rules? Which ones, and why?
   

Here are some tips about following rules that you can reinforce through discussion of this topic with your child:

• Rules are important because they help to keep things fair for everyone, they help keep us safe, and they remind us to treat each other with respect.
• People who break the rules may cause harm to others as well as to themselves.

Reinforce with your child the techniques that were suggested in the program to make it easier to follow rules:

• Talk to yourself about why you should follow the rule.
• Use self-control and wait your turn.
• Pay attention so you can follow directions.

Let your child know that you are always available to talk about any problems he or she may have with a particular rule – why it is important, whether or not it is fair, how best to follow it.

Books you might read with your child: Doug Rules by Nancy E. Krulik, Horton Hatches the Egg by Dr. Seuss.

Sept 2015: Grade 2, Sharing

 

Now that we're back in school, children have to remember the art of compromise and how to share with one another. In a repeat of a lesson they had in first grade, students viewed a short video called Can I Have a Turn? Learning About Sharing. The program’s goal is to demonstrate different ways to share and how sharing helps people get along better with others. It also helps children become aware that when it comes to sharing, not all situations need be the same.

 

The program shows children:

• problems can arise when one child monopolizes something that other children might want to play with.

• some of the ways they can share are by dividing things up, playing together instead of alone, and taking turns.

• choosing not to share is okay, but just taking something if someone decides not to share it is not okay.

• it may seem unfair, but someone’s decision not to share something that belongs to them needs to be respected.

• if they don’t want to share something, they should save it to play with by themselves and find other things to share.

Talk with your child about what he or she has learned about sharing by creating openings for conversation on this topic.

Reading books together can reinforce your child’s understanding of the benefits that can come from sharing and provide a springboard for discussion.

Books you might read with your child on this topic:

Barbara Shook Hazen. That Toad is Mine! HarperFestival, 1998. A humorous and satisfying look at friendship and sharing.

Mary Ann Hoberman. One of Each. Megan Tingley, 1997. A gentle message about the importance of sharing.

Kevin Luthardt. Mine! Atheneum, 2001. An ideal first picture book about sharing.

Fall 2015 K: Rules, Use Your Words

Dear Families,
My apologies for being so tardy with my newsletter updates on monthly social-emotional-learning (SEL) lessons!

Catching up, beginning with September's lesson...

Welcome to a new school year! This is the time of year when we're all adjusting to the structure of being in school, and learning our classroom and school rules. I feel it's important to explain the 'why' of rules here at school, so that children have an understanding that there are very good reasons rules are in place.
Welcome to a new school year! This is the time of year when we're all adjusting to the structure of being in school, and learning our classroom and school rules. I feel it's important to explain the 'why' of rules here at school, so that children have an understanding that there are very good reasons rules are in place.
 

For our first  Social Emotional Learning lesson of the school year in Kindergarten and 1st grade, your child viewed a short program called I Can Follow Rules by Sunburst  Visual Media. This topic is one that is import to all age groups because rules are a part of our everyday lives. It is especially important to discuss this topic with your child, because failure to follow the rules can often create unfair, unkind, or unsafe situations. Here are some questions you can ask your child to help open a discussion:

• What are some of the rules that you have to follow in school?
• Are there any rules that you don’t understand? What are they?
• Is it hard for you to follow any of the rules? Which ones, and why?

Here are some tips about following rules that you can reinforce through discussion of this topic with your child:

• Rules are important because they help to keep things fair for everyone, they help keep us safe, and they remind us to treat each other with respect.
• People who break the rules may cause harm to others as well as to themselves.

Reinforce with your child the techniques that were suggested in the program to make it easier to follow rules:

• Talk to yourself about why you should follow the rule.
• Use self-control and wait your turn.
• Pay attention so you can follow directions.

Let your child know that you are always available to talk about any problems he or she may have with a particular rule – why it is important, whether or not it is fair, how best to follow it.

Books you might read with your child: Doug Rules by Nancy E. Krulik, Horton Hatches the Egg by Dr. Seuss.

      October 2015

Dear Family Member:

During our October Social Emotional Learning (SEL) lesson, your child’s class viewed a program called Share Your Feelings: Use Your Words. This topic is important because young children’s feelings are very real and make up a large part of their world. Their ability to recognize an emotion and say how they feel not only builds self-esteem, but helps them develop social competence.

The program begins by asking viewers, “When something is bothering you, do you walk away and not deal with your feelings, or let your feelings build up inside until you explode?” Through three easy-to-understand stories bracketed by appealing music videos the program shows viewers:

• the importance of using your words to say how you feel.

• that using your words helps you tell others how you feel and what you want.

• why you should use your words when something is bothering you instead of not dealing with it or exploding.

• why you should say what you’re feeling and not expect that others can read your mind.

• why when something scares you, telling how you feel can solve the problem and make you feel better.

Ask your child to tell you about the stories in the program and the lessons the characters learned. Create an opening for discussion by asking if he or she has ever been in a situation like one of those dramatized. The ability to effectively express any of a range of feelings and have it acknowledged often depends on the size of a child’s feelings vocabulary. Here are two books for children that can help in enlarging your child’s repertory of feelings: Delis-Abrams, Alexandra. The Feelings Storybook. Adage Publications, 1998. Parr, Todd. The Feelings Book. L, B Kids, 2005.