During a December, kindergarten classes will be viewing a video called Student Workshop: Don’t Be So Bossy. Learning to negotiate and compromise are hallmarks of successful social interaction, as is the ability to stand up for oneself. Children require practice in acquiring these skills, and classmates often provide challenging interactions. This video illustrates these types of situations. January and February are often spotty for getting kids out to recess, meaning they stay with their classmates in the classroom during bad weather. This often provokes power struggles between peers. When your child displays bossy behavior toward others, ask him/her the following questions:
“Do you think you have the right to tell someone what to do?”
“Can you tell when you are hurting the other child’s feelings when you boss them?”
“How would you like it if someone talked that way to you?”
Ask your child to tell you about the stories in the program, and the lessons that the various characters learned. Here are some of the main points that the program emphasized:
- The best way to discourage a bossy person is to stand up for yourself.
- Just because someone tells you what to do doesn’t mean he or she is right.
- Bossing someone around shows a lack of respect for that person.
- It’s important to use your words and tell a bossy person how you feel.
Ask your child what he or she learned from watching this program. Discuss how these examples apply to situations in your home. Help your child use these ideas when he or she is dealing with a bossy person.
Talk to your child about situations in which he or she is having difficulty showing or getting respect. By discussing these problems, your child may be better able to identify the cause of the problem and better understand the importance of respect. With your child, try role-playing alternative solutions to these problems. Also, don’t be afraid to gently intercede when you see your child being either to bossy, or too passive.
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